I Bet That You Look Good...

on the dancefloor.


Fall Break is pretty much like... Heaven... except not really. I'm actually really excited about seeing my sister; I'm surprising myself. I'm going to go to her Mass Communications class! I'm reeeally stoked about that, too.

AND! When I come back, I get to see beautiful Dema! I'm excited!
Fall Break is going to be a great success. (lol @ Borat reference)


Today was our first bowling game and I played 2 out of 3 and won both of them! I'm actually getting a whole lot better! I've never been on a "team" sport so it's really exciting.


I'm starting to collect old cameras. So far I have a Kodak Pony II, a Polaroid Cool Cam, and a Brownie Reflex.



Michael Do is lame.

That's about it for the pointless update.

Megalomaniac.

I lost. Four votes, and I lost. It's not even the fact that I lost; I don't really care about the position anymore... it's the fact that I didn't have the support from some of my best friends. Maybe I'm being completely selfish, but I'm just really disappointed in one person in particular. But, it's over now and I can't do anything about it but get over it.

(This is NOT to make you feel guilty, Michael. Please don't take this the wrong way.)
To add on to that great news, I get a phone call. It's Michael. He dropped my lens that I let him borrow. I just kind of broke down from there. I was shocked. Too much was happening at the same time. If it were anybody I'd still be completely shocked, so it's not just that it was Michael. It was kind of like already having the impact of one fatal crash and then having another crash right after. The first crash was sort of someone else's fault and it could have been completely avoided, but the second was just an accident. But I just couldn't handle it. My stress level has been crazy lately.

Today just kind of made me realize no one can rely on each other. We do, then we're disappointed. That's why we forgive and forget, though. :)

I read over my post and it doesn't really make that much sense to me; everything just kind of flowed out and that's why everything is all jumbled and what not. AND I was trying reeeeally hard to quit ranting for a while, but I just really had to get that out. Thanks for reading and caring.

Amazing, Because It Is.

It's days like today where this guy is the only person who can give me hope.

Please watch that video. That song still gives me goosebumps.

Never Miss A Beat.

Mr. Taylor really got me thinking in Chapel today. I am so completely selfish. I complain too much, I think about myself over most everything, it's all about me. He just really opened my eyes and now it makes me sick knowing how selfish I really am.

I need to start putting God and other people before myself. This summer was so great, but what made it so great was getting the opportunity to serve other people. I love Honduras and I can't wait to go back there. The people there were so thankful for the smallest things. They love their lives even if they don't have any money to buy food. It amazes me. This whole world amazes me.

Stay Away.

I love Midtown. There's just a feeling I get walking down the street-- comfort, I'm sure. I can walk down the street and no one judges me. I can walk into a coffee shop and start an easy conversation with a random person. Is that weird? I just feel like I belong there. I also feel that way about New York, but that's for later.

The Cooper Young Festival was ravishing. So many interesting people, so much to see. I did see many people I know, some I haven't seen in a long time.. years actually. I bought The Beatles' Hey Jude record for eight bucks and I don't even have a record player (yet). I just couldn't resist. I also bought a beautiful incense burner. It's purple with stars on it and a moon/sun at the end. It's pretty neat.

Does anyone have any polaroid film they don't want?

Times Like These.

Today was such a blur. School was all right, not too bad. It kind of flew by.

The game was long and completely drawn out. I'm sad we lost. I did get to hang out with Rachel and Brandy which was good because I never get to see or talk to them.

Waffle House was better than I had anticipated.. I think. I'm not exactly certain yet. I don't know what I would do without Josh. He makes me laugh when I'm lower than low. He's the only person who can make me do that and he has no idea. Tonight was definitely full of emotions. We made some pretty good memories there thanks to Garrett. Despite the fact that I was pretty upset, I had fun. I think I'm just really confused and lost right now. I need some revival.

Tomorrow will hopefully be stellar. I'm meeting Corrie at Cooper Young Fest. That is one of two festivals that I live for. Literally.

Mixtape.

You know how I said things will probably get better? Well, they didn't today.





Today just wasn't my day. At all. Bowling practice was absolutely horrible. I bowled a 59(I know, right?) and then I bowled a 104. I was just so off today.

I'm pretty sure I failed a quiz.

I drove like a maniac home.

I'm bitter.

I'm really disappointed, quite frankly.

Could I be anymore negative?

Videotape.

I think I just died a little. A lot, actually.

Sorry about the emo-ness today, guys. It's not a good day at all and it just got worse.

But thank you, Dema, for opening my eyes. I needed that.

edit:
I have a feeling things will get better. Maybe not now, but someday.

Soco Amaretto Lime.

Do you think God purposely gives us happiness and then takes it away? Maybe that's bad phrasing... Do you believe there is a logical reason we are extremely happy one minute and the next we have basically nothing? ... I mean, I guess it's a test of faith... but there's only so much one person can take. Maybe I'm reading too much into this. All I know is that whoever said "it takes time" was lying. It's been two years, is that not enough?


Today wasn't that great at all.
And I wish I had some polaroid film for my new cool cam. :(

The Created Void.

Let’s do this for each other
Let’s do this for truth
I give for you, you give for me
Let me take you somewhere, I can not explain
I’m stumbling right in front of you now
I won’t refrain from guiding you there
Normal is not so farWas it just a dream
Or something much more
We are not alone
Since you agreed to follow
It’s all in my head, if you want, you can look inside
There’s nothing but red and all the mess I’ve been
It’s all in the way I say what I don’t mean, and mean what I don’t
I need to speak of you and what is real
They will never understand
What eats at our insides

High Hopes.

I honestly think I have the worst luck there is.

I start liking a boy (finally) and it never evolves into anything and I just get hurt in the end. I finally let my guard down and just get my heart stomped on. It sucks. I think I keep setting myself up for it, though.

Why can't life be simple?

I just want someone to accept me for me. I want a guy I can talk to about anything and everything. I want to gain his trust and give him mine back. I just want to have fun. Am I asking too much?

Ahh, I'm sorry I'm ranting. I can't help it.
I just want to smile and mean it. :)

Too Bright to See, Too Loud to Hear.

This weekend was very good. It was probably the best one I've had in a longgg time. Friday was the first home game against SBEC. It was a pretty good game and we won. Then we all went to Waffle House. It was verrry nice. Haha. I love those boys. We were out until at least 12, I think. Saturday was very eventful. Justin, Jeremy, Dema, Nadine, and I all went to Germantown Fest. It was pretty cool. Then we all went to Target and I bought Borat and Almost Famous, haha. Then Justin, Jeremy, and I went to Kaht's house for like 20 minutes and stuffed our faces with pizza and then we went to High Point for her show with Irene, Logan, and Corytaylorcox. It was pretty rad. We played scrabble, which Justin has never played, haha. I quit because it was so retarded. Then they played mad libs, chess, and connect four. Then after the show, we came to my house to watch Borat because Jeremy and Justin have never seen it! Mucho funno. So all in all, my weekend was amazing and I'm so glad it happened. So now all I have to do is hope and wish...